The Portugal Papers

Co-authored with my sister, Anne.

I am taking a slight detour with today’s Portugal Paper to share some lessons about being a great Aunt.

Aunt Mary Jane died recently, after a long battle with Parkinson’s disease, and her memorial service is this weekend. It’s incredibly weird being so far away during this time, but I’m grateful that my father, sister, and nieces are flying to Kansas City for the service. Mary Jane was a great Aunt. The best Aunt. She was our family historian. She was our resident cake-baker. She was a teacher, who inspired my sister to follow in her footsteps. She was an avid reader and lover of books. She was always helping, always giving, always present. From her, I learned the joys of being an Aunt.

So here, in no particular order, are lessons Mary Jane taught us about being a great Aunt:

• Read. Always carry a book with you, and make sure your nieces always have new books to read. I have lost track of the number of bookstores and libraries we visited together.
• Go on adventures. When we were kids, Mary Jane took us to picnics in the park, the museum, the Coterie Theater at Crown Center, and Worlds of Fun. We saw the fireworks display at Weatherby Lake. We drove to Lawrence, KS to shop and eat lunch at a cute cafe. She drove to St. Joseph when Anne was in college for dinner and a play at a local theater. Little trips, big fun.
• Feed your loved ones. From chicken-fried steak to Italian cream cake, Aunt Mary Jane was a talented cook and hosted many family meals. She also cooked with us – I have a distinct memory of standing on a stepstool, helping her flip silver-dollar pancakes. Anne watched her stir big batches of Chex Mix, which she made every year at the holidays.
• Be crafty. Mary Jane had the best craft and ribbon drawer in the world. Her gift-wrapping and homemade cards were legendary. Many a childhood hour was spent cutting, gluing, and glittering our way to craft glory.
• Be available, even long-distance. Send encouraging notes and college care packages. Mary Jane would chat on the phone with us for hours. Anne remembers asking for career path advice, and later telling her funny stories about her kindergarten class kiddos.

I love being an Aunt, and I learned from the best. Thank you, Aunt Mary Jane. We miss you.